Monday, October 4, 2010

What is my purpose???

So...I've been thinking a lot about PURPOSE. What is my purpose in life? Merriam-Webster says: Purpose - something set up as an object or end to be obtained. What end do I want to obtain? Some of the synonyms listed for the word purpose were: goal, intention, dream, plan and objective.
Do I have goals, intentions, dreams, plans or objectives? Of course I do. I have dreams for myself, my family, my children, my church. I have intentions...lots of good ones too. haha I have goals (especially with weight loss and physical health), and of course I've got plans and objectives. Oh, how I plan. Always making lists, drawing up ideas and things "to do"...
I realised that this was not getting me anywhere closer to knowing what MY purpose in life was. There were so many "ends" that I wanted to obtain. As a Christian woman, Pastor's wife, and mother of four beautiful children...I wondered if my purpose was just to give to everyone for the rest of my life - to serve others. That's not so bad, and honestly I don't mind it. I love it and am happy to do it. It brings me joy. But at the risk of sounding selfish...What about ME? Do I just forget about the other things that bring me joy? Things like my art, reading, writing, being alone to just "be"... Dreams of really finding the "real me"? I was getting more and more confused. What do I do when I'm confused?
I go to my Life's Handbook...the Bible. =)
I found that God has a purpose for me. Jeremiah 29:11~For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Wow. That takes some of the worry out of it. So I continue to seek it out further. Then I find this: Psalm 138:8~The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever — do not abandon the works of your hands.
I was doing a study shortly after this about loving God. Mark 12:30 says: And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment. The first commandment! Must be important!
I've also done studies on different women of the Bible and how their lives had a role in history. I found that they were all of different ages, social status, some were mothers, some were widows, some were queens... But they all fulfilled a purpose for Him. I look at godly women that I know and consider to be mentors, whether I know them in real life or from studying the books or articles they've written, I find myself trying to keep up with them or trying to mother my children like other Christian mothers. I find myself trying to be the kind of Pastor's wife that I think my congregation would want me to be and all becomes so daunting.
You know what? I have it all wrong! My purpose is not to be a perfect mother, sister, wife, leader...whatever! My purpose in life - the reason I was put on earth - is to please GOD!! If I strive to please God daily, everything else will fall into place! I have no business trying to please everyone else in this world, if I haven't first pleased God. My God made me to be a caring, loving, giving person - but to balance it out - He also made me creative, a lover of art and knowledge, needing time to myself... I want more in life - always. It's okay! As long as I can do what I do and still please God, I am fulfilling my purpose. I was made to worship Him, to love Him, to honor Him and share Him with others.
I am so thankful that I know that now. Most of all, I believe that God is pleased when I live an AUTHENTIC LIFE. That is my desire and I believe that it will please Him. That's enough.


I am His Beloved said...

You are so beautiful! God has used you in my life in a powerful way and I am not sure you even realize it. Love you!

Anonymous said...


Yolanda said...

Our "Life Handbook" is so full, chocked full, of vital info and love for us, you and I.

With love,

Katrina said...

Thank-you. I needed that. =)