Cross-Fit? *wimpers*

So, I have an awesome cousin who, besides being beautiful, sincere, a Jane Austen fan, lover of food, deeply spiritual, compassionate, strong, etc, etc... is a personal trainer at her gym, CrossFit Center City , in Philadelphia.
At my request, she has written up a month of work outs for me. I am only on day 4 and I was brought to tears.
How did I get to this point? I will be 40 this year. I weigh waaaaay more than I should and even though my mind feels fit, my body laughs cruelly in my face. With every squat and lunge, I can feel it mocking me. Ugh. Today, I really wanted to quit. It hurt and I still had another AMRAP to do.
I finished. Not because I wanted to, but because I knew I'd have to text Erin to let her know how I did. So...I finished. My legs are wobbly. I'm a sweaty mess and I cried a little.
It was worth it. Just one day closer to looking and feeling better.
I mentioned in my last post that I don't like to try things if I am not sure that I can do them perfectly. I think that is part of my fear. I know this will be work. I know that I will fail on some days.
Last week, I posted this as my status: "The key to change...is to let go of fear." ~Roseann Cash
I don't want to be afraid. I need to do this.
Even better than the quote is this verse: Isaiah 41:10~Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
I thought about the verse and then I needed an upbeat song that was at least 3 minutes to get me through my squats. This is the song I played and it was perfect. Great lyrics. It's called "Move" by Mercy Me from their newest album "The Generous Mr. Lovewell" I know I'm not alone in this journey. I just have to remember it when it gets hard.

Friday Fill-Ins...

And...here we go!

1. I feel a little anxious about the upcoming school year.

2. I am so behind on my Summer reading list, I'm going to need to call it my summer, fall, winter reading list just to catch up.

3. Do what you know in your heart is the right thing to do. Don't let fear or intimidation get in the way.

4. It's okay to be completely unique.

5. It's hard to know how much you can handle if you never try. I never want to try anything that I am not sure I can do perfectly...that's ridiculous. I need to worry less about perfection and just try. I am teachable...so that's a plus. It's just scary sometimes, you know? And I'm talking about everything from a new art project, to losing weight, to work-related items, to fixing things in a relationship and more!!

6. Be honest, keep it real, and hope everyone else follows suit.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to some much needed family time, tomorrow my plans include working out, cleaning, school and church year planning, and more family time and Sunday, I want to meet with some of my favorite people at awesome church!

What a day...

Today was a day jam packed with emotions. My day started very early with a call that my dear friend and church member delivered a beautiful, healthy baby girl while the rest of the world slept. I was so excited and happy for the couple. This is their first and we've been waiting a good while to meet her.

I would've gotten myself together to head right out to see them, but my daughter had a big day planned with a few of her best girlfriends. I was to be the lucky chaperone, as they are all too young to drive. We spent a wonderful day at the Mission Inn, looking through antique shops, and having a yummy lunch together. For me, it was a chance to watch my daughter interact with her friends and to see her truly happy and free.

After a great time with them and dropping them off at home, Hannah and I headed home.

I didn't even get out of the car. My husband slid into the driver's seat as he and I went to the hospital to visit the new baby.

She is absolutely perfect. Just beautiful. Mommy got to the hospital early this morning and had the baby about 30 minutes later. Can you believe it? Wow. It was a joyful time, to say the least. We bid them goodbye and continued to talk of the baby's sweetness as we left the hospital.

From there we went to another hospital nearby where another member of ours is just starting chemotherapy. He went in a while back to get his eye checked, because of pain and swelling, and from there found out that he has cancer in his eye, his stomach and more I believe. While he was in the hospital having stress tests done to see if he could endure some of the medications, he had a heart attack. I just felt so bad for him. He doesn't have a whole lot family.

So, we stayed with him for a bit and my husband and I prayed with him and shared some comforting words. He has great difficulty talking because of the tumor in his head. He will be getting transported to another hospital for radiation to his eye and then return again.

I share all of this with you to tell you...no, remind you that we are all at a different stage in our lives. I have recently been talking with people who are dealing with marital issues, drug abuse, joblessness, family hurts... People are hurting out there, but there is also joy. New babies, weddings, engagements, families reunited...

None of us know how long we are here on this earth. What are you doing with your time here? We all make a difference...but is it positive or negative? Are you letting yourself get worked up over the little things? Are you being true to yourself and those around you? Are you taking the time to really appreciate what you do have? Are you sharing the Gospel with anyone?

Just some things to think about...I know that it has given me reason to pause.

James 4:14 "Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away."

It's summer!

Summer night skies...

Summer salads...

Summer fruit...

Summer fun...

Wow! I can not believe it is July already. We have really had so much going on! School ended and we moved the same week. Then the weekend after school was out, we packed up for a road trip to head on up to my brother-in-law's wedding in Washington state.

We spent some time with my mom, dad and sister and then after the wedding we headed home with a pit stop in Boise, Idaho.

We had a great time with friends that we made in college. It was wonderful to visit their church and stay a few days with them. They also have 3 girls and 1 boy and our kids got along fabulously! It was like a dream.

We drove over 3,000 miles. It was so tiring, but it was a great time of memories. Now we are home and trying to settle ourselves in this new home that we're renting. It's been great so far and I'm looking forward to making amazing memories here!

Wordless Wednesday: Flower Girl and Ring BOY! hahaha

Friday Fill-ins... 5/21/10

(some sights I look forward to seeing again when we drive up to Washington)

You can follow this meme here.

1. Knowing that my children are safe, healthy, and happy never fails to make me smile.

2. I'm looking forward to moving and settling in before we have to go on a road trip for an out of state wedding.

3. Pandora (cello music) is what I'm listening to right now.

4. Potato salad must have DILL pickles in it!

5. A juicy, Fuji apple was the best thing I ate today.

6. Today was long anticipated.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to dinner at a friend's home, followed by music practice with the band, tomorrow my plans include finishing up the cleaning/purging of the garage, visiting and checking out a house to rent and Sunday, I want to relax and worship my Savior!

Sometimes you just need to let go...

that's why I'm drinking herbal tea today, instead of coffee. Ha!

No, seriously. I have been having a little bit of a rough time lately. Just "stuff". The thing is that it's really not my own "stuff" that I've been stressing over. Well, one thing is and that is the fact that we have to move because the house we're renting is being sold.

Anybody have room for a family of 6 and two small dogs?? o_O A little stressed about that!

Anyway, I worry for everyone else. I hurt for my siblings when they hurt. I get angry when I see somebody I love making the same mistakes over and over. I feel betrayed when people you care about and would do anything for, take advantage of your kindness.

So...after much worry, much crying, much sighing, and I'm sure much eye rolling....I'm letting it go. I have to. It's not my thing to be depressed or sad or anxious. It does not suit me.

I've got tea to drink now... Have a great day and KEEP IT REAL!